If I bring her home for Thanksgiving no one in the family will think I’m gay.  

Your girlfriend is taller and less Asian than you.  Are you Asian?  I can’t tell.  You look kind of Asian.  Even if you’re not really Asian at all, your girlfriend is definitely less Asian than you.  And taller.

They do this every morning, she finds it’s the best angle to tuck it up (because she has a penis).

In her younger more impressionable years, she beat up a bunch of dudes.

It’s okay that he’s twice her age because he’s half her height.

If you really need me, just reach out and touch me.  Come on SHORTY let me know. 

His legs are the two things in this picture that are NOT augmented.

A match made in heaven.  Or in some sort of alternate-universe heaven where guys would need stilts to kiss their wives if there wasn’t a set of steps handy.  Hey, who are you to say what heaven is to them?

If he could only have spiked that hair up just…a little…higher…